"You can clutch the past so tightly to your chest that it leaves you too full to embrace the present"
One thing I believe people "clutch" is pain, regret and anger. Do you allow trivial and petty mishaps, words, deeds to raddle you to the core, do you constantly recite them and ruminate on it and maybe even alter what happened to feed your pride? Do you memorize each offense and replay those offenses day after day all day long? I know someone like this. He is the most unhappy person I have ever met. If you were to give him the gift of his dreams, he would take it and then go pout in a corner because he had to go his entire lifetime without anyone having the heart to do that for him before...(seriously missing the point!) Days, months, years can go by and this person cannot forgive his offenders, no matter what the offense and more often than not, ignoring his own offensive actions.
My children conceived through a very short marriage should be considered a gift to always embrace. It is a terrible, terrible shame that my new baby girl, my little miracle - is completely and utterly neglected by her father because he cannot move past his anger toward me. He told me he is sad because he misses his son, but has refused to acknowledge that he has a daughter. A long time ago, he told me he regretted not having been in his firstborn child's life (a daughter) so he would like to have a daughter...Now he has one, but she's not convenient...in fact, she's a mistake. So I had to question why he "misses" his son. He is certainly able to see him, inquire of him, spend time with him, talk to him on the phone, provide and care for him! The fact is, he has denied his children because in order to be a part of his life, he has to have contact with me, the wife undeserving of forgiveness. What a shame...but it is his choice...
"Unforgiveness is like drinking poison and wanting someone else to be harmed or die from it."
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