The christian life was considered by Paul as running a race (1 Co 9:24; 2 Tim 4:7).
These last few years' events have created great need for perseverance along with endurance.
I have desired to run the race; "hit the ground running", move "full speed ahead" and not be slowed down by allowing myself to be a victim of circumstance or consequence. I know that when trials ensue; the Lord has a purpose and people are observing not only how I run but also what the Lord will accomplish through it.
Struggling and fatigued, I continued to run often thinking of the great cloud of witnesses (Heb 12:1) and the audience of my life and not wanting to let either down. Some in my audience have exited and become part of that cloud of witnesses; I miss them and feel great loss.
As I cried out to a friend in recent days and confessed to her that I no longer want to be strong - that I feel it is required of me to be strong, how burdening that responsibility felt to me. She asked me what I think that means.
I told her that I must not stop. I must keep going. I must lead with outstanding victory. Surely if I did, all would see how the Lord is fueling me. She prodded me to think of what "strength" looks like to me and basically I concluded with "not needing help."
At the same time, I have been feeling incredibly lonely; without true fellowship and accountability. I want to share the testimonies God has given me to give Him glory, but I also need to be encouraged and held accountable in the discipline of "working out my faith" and through the sanctification process.
I thought of a race-car driver. The racer stops. The racer has a pit crew. The racer has a better chance of completing the race as a champion with a crew he can count on and a crew that keeps him on "pit stop" schedule.
I felt that I was crewless. I wanted to stop the race for respite, repair, refueling...even to rejoice in how far I've come thus far. But where was my crew?
I called out to God and I cried to my friend. I lie prostrate through the evening into dawn meditating on the Word of God and allowed it to instruct me. I prayed for strengthening IN HIM and I prayed that he would give me a purpose; and that to fulfill that purpose faithfully, I asked him to equip me.
With swollen and red eyes, I went through the day receiving one encouragement after another. Distant and close friends reaching out to me like waves on a sea shore, grace for grace.
I don't know much about racing so I looked up "pit crew" using Google. I found this on Wikipedia:
In motorsports, a pit stop is where a racing vehicle stops in the pits during a race for refuelling, new tires, repairs, mechanical adjustments, a driver change, or any combination of the above. By making pit stops cars can carry less fuel, and therefore be lighter and faster, and use softer tires that wear faster but provide more grip. Teams usually plan for each of their cars to pit following a planned schedule, the number of stops determined by the fuel capacity of the car, tire lifespan, and tradeoff of time lost in the pits versus how much time may be gained on the race track through the benefits of pit stops. Choosing the optimum pit strategy of how many stops to make and when to make them is crucial in having a successful race. It is also important for teams to take competitors' strategies into account when planning pit stops, to avoid being "held up" behind other cars and unable to overtake them. An unscheduled or extended stop, such as for a repair, can be very costly for a driver's chance of success, because while the car is stopped for service, cars remaining on the track can rapidly gain distance on the stopped car.
I was convicted. I confess now that I am not crewless; I was clueless.
It is okay for me to recognize areas in which I need help. It is okay to ask for that help. It is okay for me to stop, even better if I schedule one. It is ok for me to have a team and to know the value each member brings. If I don't...I will run on empty, I will crash, I will burn; I will lose the race and I will not have part in victory. Though I have been running and running and running (on pride); I have been overtaken by the obstacles I ignorantly thought I could run over. Breaking down can be very costly when pursuing excellence! How can I run a race without acknowledging there will be pits? I am learning it is ok to recognize when in a pit. Sometimes life is the pits! But that doesn't mean the race is lost. It does not mean there is no help. It does not mean I am a lone. God promises that!
Thanks be to God for strategically placing people in my life; whether they be in the audience, the time keeper, the sponsors, the pit crew members, the great cloud of witnesses - for with their help I continue to run the race.
I shall not overlook them going forward.
