Last week Saturday we took a trip to Chicago. Loaded to the top and about to bust at the seams, the little orange Kia made its way down the road. As we started out, I thought I would try to instill some excitement in my son. So I said, "We're going to Chicago! Woo hoo!" and he caught on very fast. He's a bit too fast of a learner. The first 40 minutes was full of "Cago! Woo Hoo!" about as repetitive as the wheels going round and round. Headache. Two motrin. Stop for a pepsi - this might be a long drive. Abigael sleeps.
Noam asks, "Bobby comin?". I answer, "Yes, of course! He's riding up front with me!" (where? Well, I have an imagination, too! Stretched out along the front dashboard -it's the only place he'd fit!) My answer did not suit my son. He replied, "no, Bobby comin on the horse." Uh, ok...
Noam and I sing songs. ABCDEFG...H...I...Twinkle Twinkle Little Star...Jesus Loves Me...and you and you and you! Happy Birthday to you...Big Big Balls, Big Big Balls, All the way...FUN! oh what Fun! Laughter.
Abigael sleeps yet we hear her loudly sucking and smacking her thumb. We made great time. It was so nice to see the Schaumburg again. I was looking forward to eating at Smiling Buddha and meeting Amy for lunch. As I pull off the highway and drive past the nation's second largest mall (Woodfield!)I saw a Panda Express that was not there a year ago. Man, I knew I should never have moved!
Amy and I meet in the parking lot of our dining destination. I make a quick comment while walking past my car trunk that it looks as though I left the lights on, but perhaps it just looks that way because the sun is striking it such. I ordered Sui Mui and Kwok Tei potstickers eager to share their glory with Amy who had just told me that she no longer ate meat due to a new lifestyle. Great listening skills. Amy informs me she's ours for the entire day! w00t!
Leaving Smiling Buddha and on our way to Hyatt Place, we load up Noam and Abigael. I come around the back end of my car and notice that the sun is STILL causing my tail lights to shine. Hmmm. Jumping into the driver seat I instinctively place my hand on the keys -that were already in the ignition. Nothing. Gee. I left my lights on...and my keys in the ignition. Uh –we’re not in country anymore! Amy pulls out her jumper cables and asks me how I am placing the cables onto my battery. I retort, "red on red, black on black" She laughs and informs me both her ends are red. She says, "Positive on positive, negative on negative." Hmmm.
We enter Hyatt with two screaming crying children tired from the trip. I have stains all over my "almost" stirrup pants that I am eager to change out of before we head to the mall. We are ignored at the front desk but, since my kids were wailing we finally wound up getting some help. Entering the room we exclaim, "ooh!" Yes. It was a very nice set up -decorated in citrus colors. CITRUS KISS!
Opening my luggage, I scurry through the clothing for the three of us, tossing article after article on the floor in a heap. Two days of clothes for Noam and Abby each -check! Shirt for me, shirt for me -Check! No pants. Oops.
Amy suggests that we take the kids swimming and that after I take that shower I needed (ewe, stinky stinky!)I change into my bathing suit, wash my pants by hand and hang them to dry while we swim. Smart!
I inform Amy that I am going to throw Abigael into the water and watch her instinctively swim. She looks at me appalled. She was really surprised when I went through with it. She swam! Noam plays in the water. I try to be the cool mom and place him sitting on my shoulders. I walk further into the pool. I forgot I was short. With my hands around Noam, I could not really swim. Dumb. We survive. Amy must have thought she was a stand in in a current day Amelia Bedelia episode. Noam swims to me - about two feet. Impressive!
Back in the hotel room, my pants are still soaked. Amy takes the blow dryer to them as I get my kids changed and fed and ready for the mall. After considerable dryer time on my pants, I decide to just wear them. I make a comment about catching a cold going out with wet pants. Amy says, "your pants don't touch your lungs." Duh. As we walk through from the elevator to the parking lot I say to Amy, "maybe they have a shuttle that can take us all to the mall." We look up. There's a shuttle! Go!
We walk around the mall, two kids in a stroller, my white coat dragging across the mall floor, Amy holding Abby, Noam taking every article of clothing he sees off the rack, and me with chilly buns. Cold!
There was nothing to find. Could not find a pair of jeans for Abigael. Disappointing! The 2nd biggest mall in America and no jeans for a baby girl that don't have cutesy rainbow throw up all over them. Ugh
We're getting hungry. We check the Macy's clearance rack. I find something. I like it. I like the sale price a lot better. We go to the check out. I pay. I return the mall stroller while Amy takes Abigael with her to get a coffee at Starbucks. Noam asks, "Where's Amy? Where's Abby?" likes he's an autistic kid counting. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat.
We meet Amy and Abigael in Starbucks. I ask her if she has my Macy's bag with the shirt I just bought. She says no. I realize. I never took it from the register. Back to Macy's. The cashier lady is not there. We sit. We wait. There she is. She's panting. "oh, there!" She says. She tells us how she ran all over the store looking for us and finally dropped my shirt off downstairs at the lost and found. Amy goes to hold the shuttle with Noam. Abigael and I wait for the cashier to return with my shirt. Now she's really panting. I grab and go feeling a bit guilty as the lady is still calling after me trying to explain the great lengths she took to find me and how all that running around had made her tired. I could barely understand her accent anyway. Rude.
I'm getting crabby. Eat. What are we going to eat? I decide it's too late to take the kids out to a restaurant. We decide to order Nancy's. Nope. No Nancy's in the area for delivery. We ask the front desk for menus. We decide to get food from Chevy's. We call Take Out Taxi to order. They want to charge us an extra $12 WITHOUT delivery tip for "processing". Uh, no. Call back. Cancel.
Eat. What to eat? I'm crabby and I'm hungry. Room Service. Back in the room again. Looking for information on room service. Nothing can be found. I pick up the phone. I hit a button. Ring ring. "Yes, I would like to order room service, please." "Which hotel? You've called the reservations 800 #." She transfers me to the hotel front desk. "Yes, I would like to order room service please." "We don't do that here." "I tried to find information in the room. There was nothing, no menu, no information." "Turn on the tv." I turn on the tv. Oh!
We look through. We settle on an order. We call the front desk -this time without involving the reservation desk. "I'd like to place a room service order, please." "We don't do that." "But I found your menu on the tv." "You can place your order in the lobby at the kiosk." I go downstairs. I find the kiosk. I enter Amy's order. Now I'm working on mine. I'm making my selections, but nothing happens on the screen. I tap tap tap tap tap tap. Nothing nothing nothing. Tap tap tap tap tap tap! Nothing. Repeat. Repeat. Repeat. I go to the front desk. "Your kiosk is not working. I'm trying to order room service." "We don't have room service." He follows me to the kiosk. An order for $198 is now showing on the screen with multiple appetizers and about twenty orders of nachos. Teehe.
The man finds that the screen is locked up. I follow him back to the front desk where he proceeds to take my room service order on the front desk kiosk. Hmmm. Couldn't he have done that when I called???? "There," he says, "we'll bring it up to you in five to ten minutes." "What does it mean, beverage?" I ask, "How does say...a Pepsi come?" "How do you want it to come?" "I mean, does it come in a 2 liter, a fountain drink?" "It's all grab and go from that case you're standing in front of." Oh. $2.50 for a 20 oz bottle. “Do you want me to put it on two ice cubes in a cup or something?” Pass. In my mind, I'm grabbing those pepsi's and throwing them at the man...and going.
Waiting in the room again. Phone rings. "Your food is ready to be picked up." "I thought the food was going to be delivered to our room." "We don’t do that, it's like three big plates." "Yea...." "Fine! We'll be up soon." Wouldn't it be three plates for one of us girls to carry by herself as well????
We watch Whip It! Noam has another night terror. Takes a while, but he settles down. Amy leaves. She's probably thrilled. What a crazy day - dead battery, wet pants, near drowning and learning that HYATT stands for Help Yourself and Tip Too! I pull back the sheets on the bed to climb in and find sweet sleep. Sleep was not there. A blood stain and two big WET stains right under the heap of pillows. YUCK! I sleep on the floor.
Sunday. I try (key word try) to bring Noam and Abby downstairs with me for the "hot continental breakfast." I find plain bagels, plain bread, cereal and milk. I put bagels into the rotating toaster thingy. Some guy comes and takes my bagels. Repeat. Noam sits down with another family and starts eating cereal. That kid! I shove the bagels between my arm, put some peanut butter and cream cheese packs in Noam's pockets, and cumbersomely carry Abigael, holding Noam's hand back up to our room. Yes, I'd like to grow a third arm. Now!
Noam eats all bagels and proceeds to eat the peanut butter right out of the cups. Time to check out. After three trips to the car down and up again with our stuff (with both kids with me), we're finally ready to go meet Sue. Sue!
Parked in front of Sue's. Does not look like anyone is home. Fifteen minutes. She should have pulled into the driveway by now from church. Wait. Noam says hi. I say hi back. I call Sue. Voicemail. Wait. Noam says hi. I say hi back. Wait. Wondering, why is Noam saying hi? Usually he says "mama". I look at him. He's looking out the window (that he opened) at Sue who is peering out of her front door. Oh!
Inside Sue's, she's making us burgers. Noam shows off what he knows. I'm mama. Abigael is Abby. He is Noam. He looks at Sue. She's "Elephant". While Sue is mortified, I'm filled with warm fuzzies in my belly and proud at his insight. He's wise beyond his years. I tell Sue about Michael Jackson's elephant story. Jim looks good. 2 years since his cancer surgery. Praise the Lord. I eat my burger. Noam does not eat his burger. I eat Noam’s burger. They all watch me eat. Oink!
Off to the Allch Inn. They are entertaining a family of 8 from Toronto. Full House or Eight is Enough? Great visit. Love them. Ron is Noam's Dr. Pop Pop, Sherry is "Gramma Sherry." We eat meat pie. Squirrel? Mutton? Beef? Who knows. Ron won't touch it. He thinks someone needs to call the ambulance. Edible!
On our way home. I no longer like to drive in the dark. Very foggy. Mama becomes a scaredy cat. I pray for safety and then remember Frances Chan's remark in Crazy Love. I dared to say a different prayer. Finally home at 11:30 pm. Kids put to bed. Wait. What's this? Both children feel warm. No, not warm. HOT. No!
And then we were sick. And then Noam informs me, quite dramatically and greatly disturbed - we left Bobby in Chicago. Oh - that's okay. He's coming back on the horse! No. Wa Wa Wa. Bad horse. Horse is naughty. No horse. Ok. Problem of missing Bobby persists, along with three fevers and three sick Asians (one Korean, two KoreaPinos) all week. What to do, what to do. Help!
Two e-mails sent to Hyatt requesting phone call to talk about my experience. They e-mailed back without really responding and are yet to call. Call!
It's a week later. Noam is better. Abigael is better (she had RSV). I'm exhausted and have yet to be fever free. It may be a while before we go back to Chicago. Bobby is back! Relieved.
Phew!
